And you'll find buried within me
The strength to leave this city.
I've grown too large still
I can't see myself at all.
Cigarette burns and coffee stains
remind me of better days.

So six seven eight years will turn to ten.
What then?
I'll have seen nothing but concrete
And a whole lot of loss.
Though I loved the anonimity
I know what it has cost me.

Time to get out, get to know me.
Outside of this box I call a home.

black boots in the white

Lights up over Burlington, I light up and the air is so thin, I take a breath I, lose control and, it’s always Church Street in the dead of winter, buried in the snow with a hint of, a little problem, a little solvent, black boots in the white, you think we’ll miss it?

Here we are whiskey breath on your doorstep, peeling off layers of regret, slipping on ice, saying these words so trite. I know I'll miss it, I think I've lost it, another February in your cellar and another year lost to the high. Another year lost to the high.

a viable character

fucked up little girl
you hate hate hate with every little missed step
so why all that awful confidence?
lies tumble out of your mouth
they taste like iron
and i plead for safety.
now you build a viable character
but on questionable sanity
in the mirror did you practice much
to perfect that easy breathing, that vanity?
black lace it will fade, black lace it will age
much sooner than later,
you’ll find your place with the blade…

oh holy night
look at the stars and try to fight
how simple was the world
when simple was the girl
i told the boy the truth
thought there was nothing we could lose

we lost our worth.
came hurtling toward the end
ends buttons loose

san francisco, ca 2011 // orange van, well traveled.

i've met you before
time will tell if i am right
or just plain wrong
and to quote my heroes
i always say
we can work it out.

i have my masters in memory

i tell people i've got a master's in memories
making them feel longer than a second
but only letting you see the second that they stuck.
and as for him and his heart well
i'm in for the long haul in my head
though the sad truth is
i'm always choosing the other end of a road
they call it running away but at least it's somewhere to go.