coney island fourth of july :: 2009

It is time, i think, for me to reacquaint myself with my camera. to put head to heart. for awhile, to just get rid of the madness. to be able to find vibrancy in simplicity. that's how i always learned to take photos. i'm not sure how i got here, a stranger to the lens. perhaps it is time to revel in the glass once more. doubt changes a person. it suffocated me for years.

i'm ready to be free of that doubt and put finger to trigger like i'm shooting a gun.
so fuck it, i'm going to put all these things out of their misery and just take their god damn pictures.

(from my livejournal, june 22nd, 2009)

you used to talk to me till i fell asleep i like slipped through your hands then. i used to walk with you to feel the weigh of it so try to look alive alright?

(from my LJ, january 2009)

we had to put her down.
she was my best friend.
this was the worst part
i wanted her to lick my face
just that one last time
but she didn't have the strength
so she lifted her head instead
i let her go and suffocated myself
in her absence.

but i'm not too sad, it's kind of like that movie
"marley & me" or whatever.
she was the sweetest animal and my first dog
but we saw it coming, she led a very full life
14.5 years is something like 105 dog years
i brought her home when i was 8 in 1995
blue blanket in my lap
runt of the litter.
just like me, right?